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enough
02:25
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so just step on my chest and tell me i’m enough, that my meaningfulness isn’t measured by my ability to turn my labor in to profit. pin me down and tell me that i am inherently valuable just the way i am. tell me that i’m not my bank account, not my credit score or gpa. i’ve been taught to think my whole life that these numbers if they are enough will tell me too that i am enough so please step on me and tell me that you disagree. tie me up and tell me that you care, that there’s no need to go out and buy more things to make me feel like someday i will have lived. i am trying to feel like i am living now instead of working so damn hard on surviving. tell me that i’m not my bank account, not my credit score or gpa. i’ve been taught to think my whole life that these numbers if they are enough will tell me too that i am enough so please step on me and tell me that you disagree. enough, enough, tell me i’m enough. i wish I though that i was enough. enough, enough, tell me i'm enough. i wish i thought that i was enough. enough, enough, you've always been enough. i hope you know that you are enough.
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2. |
gal pals
02:21
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just because you can date all of your friends doesn’t mean that you should. just because you’re not dating all of your friends doesn’t mean that you can’t make out with them if you all want to. cuz it doesn’t matter if you’re gals being pals or just bros being bros or bros being gal pals, gal pals can be bros. i guess what i’m saying is gender doesn’t have to exist, now you can make out with your friends and be gay. buying things won’t make me happy and a job won’t either but i have to for now. but there is something that they can’t sell to us, its affection and support to and from all my friends. so i tell my friends i love them, kiss them on the cheek. it’s important to me they always know they are enough. so i tell my friends i love them, kiss them on the cheek. it’s important to me they always know that they are loved. cuz it doesn’t matter if you’re gals being pals or just bros being bros or bros being gal pals, gal pals can be bros. i guess what i’m saying is gender doesn’t have to exist, now you can make out with your friends and be gay.
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3. |
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its late and i'm alone wallowing in solitude and all i want to do is spend five more minutes with you. i can want to be loved, i am capable of being loved. even though i don't love myself that doesn't mean that nobody will. my vanity is good for me and your compliments give me life. if only i could feel like i deserved it. i can want to be loved, i am capable of being loved. even though i don't love myself that doesn't mean that nobody will. you're so kind and you're so genuine, what do you see in me? you're so kind and you're so genuine, what do you see in me? you're so kind and you're so genuine, what do you see in me? you're so kind and you're so genuine, what do you see in me?
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4. |
don't panic
02:45
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we pass a joint back and forth behind the shower curtain as i read to you about how it doesn't mean a god damn thing. then i crawl in to your bed and you read me to sleep. don't wanna be anywhere but here. and it means something to me that its meaningless. i've always assumed but i though that it meant giving up. nothing matters to me but this moment right now and being here with you before my anxiety about the future takes me over again. i wake up with you holding me. you're still asleep. i feel so safe i can't believe. you get up first and bring me coffee in bed. i read to you. you read to me. and i can't tell if you're joking when i make your bed and breakfast that i'd make a good housewife. have you always wanted a housewife? i'll play house with you any day. i'd play house with you every day if you wanted to. and it means something to me that its meaningless. i've always assumed but i though that it meant giving up. nothing matters to me but this moment right now and being here with you before my anxiety about the future takes me over again. and i know that it won't always be this way. i wish that i could stop craving so much commitment but instead i'm over here wondering if i'm making it all up. wondering if i'm making it all up. wondering if i'm making it all up. i'm pretty sure i made this whole thing up.
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5. |
backup plan
04:42
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this town is starting to feel stale or maybe its just that i am no longer growing. part of me loves the community around me. the rest of me knows that i am settling. another part of me wants to wait here with you for the relationship that you hint at all the time. most of me knows i'll never get over you if i keep waking up in your bed in your arms. i will fall asleep with you one more time. i'll wake up with you one more time. after that i am out of here. i am done. i'm tired of feeling like i am you backup plan. i know that i will just keep putting it off. one more time, one more night. hold out hope. i know that i have been putting it off and that's on me that's my fault. i'm doing this to myself. i will fall asleep with you one more time. i'll wake up with you one more time. after that i am out of here. i am done. i'm tired of feeling like i am your backup plan. i will fall asleep with you one more time. i'll wake up with you one more time. after that i am out of here. i am done. i'd rather be alone than be your backup plan. i am not your backup plan. i'd rather be alone than be your backup plan. i am not your backup plan. i'd rather be alone than be you backup plan. i am done being your backup plan.
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